The Democrats golden unicorn, Trump's federal worker problem, and trouble in Margaritaville! Here's your daily news brief!
You're fooling yourself. Equestria is a dictatorship

How is Wonkette being a dumb stupid jerkoff Shillary for Hillary today? All of the ways!

Dr. Gundry reveals the top 3 common foods that you would have never guessed were the cause of your fatigue.
The one on the left looks awful familiar for some reason

Kentucky may be having one historic Senate election, but nobody's paying much attention. Let's fix that!
Cheesy Scalloped Potatoes

Take your cholesterol meds, and then EAT THIS NOW.

All your Corporate Malfeasance in one easy bite!

Come read your top ten stories and get all your NASTY WOMAN gear!
evan hurst. just kidding, it's young handsome joe biden!

Let 'er rip, Joe!

This is what happens when you take someone who calls themselves 'Joey Salads' seriously.
Why wouldn't you believe this man?

Shameless watchdog or public-spirited self promoter?

Hillary Clinton is a really, really good person.

Mississippi tried to prevent Medicaid funds from going to Planned Parenthood, failed.

Oprah explains that it doesn't matter if you *like* Hillary, because SHE AIN'T COMIN' TO YOUR HOUSE FOR DINNER!

Jesus thinks this guy is a laff riot.

Let's all give GOP Congressman Brian Babin an engraved, filigreed note of thanks.
"And then they started singing Bob Dylan. The horror..."

Peggy Noonan hallucinates a world where Donald Trump is sane. Then she hallucinates some more, for why not?

Protip: A punchline should refrain from literally socking people in the nose.


Trump is booed by priests, how Russia broke the Interwebz, why Peggy Noonan is still A Idiot. Your Morning News Brief!
The eyes seem to follow your wallet around the room

You want to compare foundations, Donald? Let's compare foundations.

Donald Trump will be happy to accept the outcome of the election, if he wins!

MSNBC finds world's saddest undecided voters. Still.